• Images,  Me,  Object Permanence

    Capturing desire

    I take these pictures to see myself as desirable, to see myself the way others see me, to create desire in myself, for myself. In that respect it is very connected to my creativity. Desire is the engine to my will, the need to connect is the fuel. How do you create desire? Let me know 💋

  • Me,  Moments,  Words

    Lessons I have learnt from grief

    Those of you that follow me on twitter will have seen my message about my mum’s death. She became ill with Corvid-19 around a week ago, her nursing home had an outbreak in the corridor of the building her room was on and they locked it down to isolate those people who were ill with it from those that weren’t. In retrospect it hasn’t taken long at all, however it feels like a journey of a million steps from there to here. Mum was comparatively physically robust, certainly when I contrast her with my dad’s frailty of the three years before he died. Her mind was where her fragility showed.…

  • Me,  Moments,  Words

    Love in a time of Corona Virus – when your relationship is LDR or complicated

    I don’t know about you but I am aware of tears not being far away most of the time.  Outwardly I am doing OK, if a little distracted during my working day and finding it hard to concentrate and focus.  But when you are self isolating that could be expected I think and in the main I am supported, my work is OK and my family well so far.  So, why the tears? If I enquire more closely into my feelings I notice this sense of loss, and below that fear of more loss, layered over an uncertainty that I haven’t felt for a while. Generally my sense of being…

  • Eroticon,  Me,  Moments

    Eroticon 2020 virtual meet and greet

    NAME (and Twitter if you have one) Hi I’m eye and on twitter I am @_Masterseye Tell us 3 things you are most looking forward to at Eroticon 2020 Being enthused and inspired by the speakers and the people I meet Catching up with people I know and love Meeting new people and getting to know them Sadly with a change of venue this year for the Friday night meet and greet we won’t be compiling a play list but I know that everyone enjoys that bit so…. What is a song that always makes you want to dance? OOH!  This is hard, there are so many that I love…

  • #F4TFriday,  Me,  Moments,  Words

    Regrets – I have a few, but then again …

    How far do you go back? Before I was a woman, before I felt autonomous, before I was a mother, before I was a wife, before I knew, before I understood, before I could, before I knew I should, before when I thought I was loved, before I knew I was loved? I don’t know about you but regrets seem to come with a sense of responsibility and capability. If I look back I can only do it through the eyes of the person I am now. If I revisit places I feel I have fallen short, the ones where I have real regrets, I do it with a sense…

  • #F4TFriday,  Me,  Moments,  Words

    Friends – a #F4tFriday post

    She found me raging in the university library about the lack of books, about the assumption that mature students could afford either the time to search for secondhand books or the money to buy them new.  I was raging, spitting derision for the place, for the expectations and hiding behind that rage from my fear that I had made a terrible mistake.  She saw my rage and didn’t hide from it, she knew it wasn’t aimed at her and wonder of wonders, what made me spiky and difficult to befriend for others became the reason she liked me.  She always knew that my rage had the energy to overcome my…

  • Me,  Words

    What’s wrong with her, she’s an old woman? And #CancelJaneyGodley

      This collage is comprised of the graffiti on the building opposite my house, the sign outside my house which is illuminated at night and a message sent via Facebook messenger to my youngest son.  The message was sent in September, I think the graffiti arrived in July or August this year. When I first saw the eye symbol I felt a chill.  It was too close to me.  I noticed the one on the sign outside my house the following day as I was coming back from shopping in town.  I posted my misgivings on twitter and people, quite rightly, said it was probably a coincidence, the name of…

  • #F4TFriday,  Me,  Moments,  Words

    Elpis and the Road Less Travelled

    I have a little book with me. The first entry is dated 27/07/2000, 19 years ago and 7 months into our setting up our business together with a family of four, the youngest of which was 4 years old. My thoughts were naturally revolving around my children. I can see that I am concerned with how I was spending my time with them, but also, even then, with how to be me. I write ‘The Art of Living – ways of being with children, not using the time to educate them, actually showing them yourself‘ I go further ‘How to make a job/career of that time’ Then I add ‘Therese’s…