• Us,  Words

    Object Permanence

    He’s gone again. It was a Friday morning full of leaving. No matter how hard I try it always fore-shadows the day. I am saying good-bye before I need to, protecting myself from the pain and beginning to wrap myself up in don’t cares and see you soons that sound as hollow as they feel. This time was different. I was monitoring myself, checking in with how I really felt rather than my habitual ways of dealing with separation. The old wounds were still there, I could feel the scar tissue itching. My old habits were waiting in the wings for their cue but centre stage was a clarity of…

  • Me,  Moments,  Words

    Love in a time of Corona Virus – when your relationship is LDR or complicated

    I don’t know about you but I am aware of tears not being far away most of the time.  Outwardly I am doing OK, if a little distracted during my working day and finding it hard to concentrate and focus.  But when you are self isolating that could be expected I think and in the main I am supported, my work is OK and my family well so far.  So, why the tears? If I enquire more closely into my feelings I notice this sense of loss, and below that fear of more loss, layered over an uncertainty that I haven’t felt for a while. Generally my sense of being…