• a woman with a vibrator between her legs
    #SexySaturday,  Images,  Moments,  Us

    Owning pleasure – an about us post

    I remember it so clearly. I was lying on my bed even though it was lunchtime, I was still wearing my underwear which was also odd as I like to sleep naked. However, I wasn’t there to sleep, I was there for my own pleasure, with a man that wasn’t there, and who also wasn’t my husband. We’d been talking for months, from early spring until this warm summer day. I could hear the cars on the busy road outside, going about their business as if something as if all was normal. So afraid of being caught was I that I wondered how could they not know what I was…

  • Me,  Moments,  Words

    Lessons I have learnt from grief

    Those of you that follow me on twitter will have seen my message about my mum’s death. She became ill with Corvid-19 around a week ago, her nursing home had an outbreak in the corridor of the building her room was on and they locked it down to isolate those people who were ill with it from those that weren’t. In retrospect it hasn’t taken long at all, however it feels like a journey of a million steps from there to here. Mum was comparatively physically robust, certainly when I contrast her with my dad’s frailty of the three years before he died. Her mind was where her fragility showed.…

  • Moments,  Words

    Go for a walk, then write about it

    I was reminded the other day about the state known as subfrenzy.  This is most notable in women who become aware of the concept of a D/s relationship, often via films or writings of some kind and then become obsessed with finding a Dom or getting their slightly bemused partner to Dominate them.  This is often not accompanied by proper exploration or evaluation of the risks and benefits.  Many people, and I include myself in that category, do not have a well functioning method of communication, understand the concept of consent or have good boundaries.  Many are co-dependent and see D/s as a way to explain why they see themselves…

  • woman with plaits
    #F4TFriday,  Words

    #F4TFriday – oops we did it again!

    You might have seen my twitter posts with #InAField as the tag over the last couple of years.  Initially they were accompanied by pictures of our candlelabra as we ate in the evening.  Most recently the pictures have included boots, tweed jackets and sometimes have even been taken from the back of a carriage as we have careered around a field.  After a lifetime of not being sporty I find myself a competitor in a sport so far removed from my working class background that it makes me gasp. Think of Ben Hur, minus the wheel spurs obviously, and complete with a woman hanging onto the back of a carriage…

  • #F4TFriday,  Me,  Moments,  Words

    Friends – a #F4tFriday post

    She found me raging in the university library about the lack of books, about the assumption that mature students could afford either the time to search for secondhand books or the money to buy them new.  I was raging, spitting derision for the place, for the expectations and hiding behind that rage from my fear that I had made a terrible mistake.  She saw my rage and didn’t hide from it, she knew it wasn’t aimed at her and wonder of wonders, what made me spiky and difficult to befriend for others became the reason she liked me.  She always knew that my rage had the energy to overcome my…

  • #F4TFriday,  #sexbloggersformentalhealth,  Words

    Under the same moon – a #F4tFriday post

    We spend most of our lives apart.  We live our days out going to work or sorting chores or household tasks at the weekend.  We see  separate friends separately.  We cook and eat at a hundred and ten miles distance.  I don’t help him to reach a difficult place to soap His back in the shower.  He doesn’t hold a coat open for me to put on a coat with ease.  Our kisses are infrequent, our hugs can be counted on the fingers of no hands most weeks, we rarely sleep with limbs entwined and yet I count this as my most intimate relationship ever. This wasn’t planned.  Our love…

  • Me,  Words

    What’s wrong with her, she’s an old woman? And #CancelJaneyGodley

      This collage is comprised of the graffiti on the building opposite my house, the sign outside my house which is illuminated at night and a message sent via Facebook messenger to my youngest son.  The message was sent in September, I think the graffiti arrived in July or August this year. When I first saw the eye symbol I felt a chill.  It was too close to me.  I noticed the one on the sign outside my house the following day as I was coming back from shopping in town.  I posted my misgivings on twitter and people, quite rightly, said it was probably a coincidence, the name of…

  • #F4TFriday,  Moments,  Words

    #F4TFriday – Memories, Moments and Wanting More

    The Beach Boys are playing ‘God Only Knows, as I type this in front of a fire that I hefted the coal for into my car boot at the garage as He got soaked to the skin putting air in my sodden tyres to keep me safe.  In this cosy setting we paint us on a canvas bought for another purpose.  We paint over the existing brush strokes with our conversations, moving from twitter to plans, to work, to people we know, with ease and interest.  We lighten the shadows, highlight an obscured point of interest, deepen the darkest places until they glow again.  Sometimes we just hug on His…

  • #F4TFriday,  Me,  Moments,  Words

    Elpis and the Road Less Travelled

    I have a little book with me. The first entry is dated 27/07/2000, 19 years ago and 7 months into our setting up our business together with a family of four, the youngest of which was 4 years old. My thoughts were naturally revolving around my children. I can see that I am concerned with how I was spending my time with them, but also, even then, with how to be me. I write ‘The Art of Living – ways of being with children, not using the time to educate them, actually showing them yourself‘ I go further ‘How to make a job/career of that time’ Then I add ‘Therese’s…